The Viking
For one of the first time in my life, I am unable to write about how I feel. It's a mixture of gratefulness but SO much pain. It's the pain that I am having the hardest time describing or actually letting myself feel. The emotions around my parents have been beyond confusing. I almost wish it was one emotion I felt towards them all the time: pain. Then my healing would be directed in one energy. My healing process has been like that ride I used to ride as a child. I would be sitting in the back row of this Viking Ship and it would sway back and forth, almost like it would touch the sky, and I would feel the force lifting my lungs until I felt almost out of breath. Then, my heart rate would settle, but the anxiety with mount because I knew I would be right back up there in a matter of seconds. I think this mainly comes from the fact that my parents are also healing in their own way, which is a bit hard for me to understand as I have been healing since the age of 6 when I fel...